Letters from A to Z
by ProudAnimeGeek
Summary: Made up by short stories! Nice guys come last? Are there bugs in her hair? Gaara murderous over blinking lights? Enjoy! M for future stories.
1. A is for Akimichi

Chouji Akimichi was a nice guy and all his life he was told "Nice guys finish last". It made him chuckle. It really did. Not only was the quote based on here-say, it was comepletely untrue! He was the shining example.

Out of all his friends, he was the **first** to get a girlfriend (or at least the first to admit to having one... lazy shikamaru).

Out of all of his friends he was the**first** to lose his virginity (Well, it was more of a tie, as he did technically have sex with one of his friends).

Out of all of his friends he was the **first** to be engaged (She didn't want to wait any longer and couldn't see why it was taking Chouji so long to ask her, so she decided to ask him).

Out of all his friends he was the **first** to get married (He didn't have to do anything for the wedding, just show up and wear what he was told to, move when he was told to, dance when he was told to and say what he was told to).

And out of all of his friends he was the **second**to have children. ( A gorgeous little girl named Orihime. Looked just like her mother...and screamed at him like her too). He might have been second but he wasn't last!

So it was with a smiling face and a slight chuckle that he drew Ino to him in a bear hug and kissed the top of her head. "The things some people say... "


	2. B is for bugs

Now, it wasn't in Hinata's nature to screach at a high frequencey, gaining tons of attention from passer by's and nearly deafening those that were too close. But sometime, just sometimes, Shino just went too far.

"SHINO!" A nest of bugs were currently detaching themselves from Hinata's hair, in a very quick and serious manner. Not only was the hair being rip at by a brush trying to untanlge the mountain of a nest they'd made, but there was a high probabitlity that a toxic cloud of rose scented hair detangler was on it's way.

"I can't belive you put a bunch of bug to nest, IN MY HAIR!" Shino was getting a bit scared. Never had Hinata been so, so...scary. She was acting like Ino or Sakura. Or worse, the hokage!

"Hair is the perfect medium for thier nest type..." Stated like it made perfect sense to infest a girls head with bugs... Hinata shook violently for a moment before becoming serene, like the calm before the storm or halfway through a hurricane... Not that anyone would have notice, but Shino paled considerably and started to look for ecape routes. He knew there was a reason Kiba had ran away from him, like his life depended on it, when he told him about his ingenious plan. He just didn't think it was because of Hinata's reaction to his ingenious plan. Perhaps he could move to the tea country? There was sure to be a lot of bugs that lived there...

"But why MY hair Shino, why not your own!" Hinata pointed at his head like he wouldnt know what she was talking about whithout doing so. But that was a stupid suggestion.

"I dont have nearly the adequite amount of hair requied to make such a nest." Hinata turned beet red and then slowly turned purple. Purple was always her colour, but Shino didn't think that this was quite so healthy to maintain on a permanent basis. Plus, a purple face was quite an alariming feature and not at all coveted.

"Find an alternative or i'll exterminate every, single, one of them!" Hinata actually glared at Shino. She glared at him! And boy did he run, like a little girl, to find a replacement.


	3. C is for Choice

Family was everything to him. Without his family, he was nothing. So why was he so willing to throw all that away for just one night, one night, with this man? None of it made any sense to him. He tried to think logically. But all his logic told him to was run. Run away and never turn back. He wanted this so badly, he was shaking. But why? Why God damn it!

"Neji, look at me. We don't have to do this. We can just, turn around and pretend this never happened." Shikamaru was looking at him with no emotion. Mostly no emotion. His eyes betrayed him. They were hazy with lust but guarded. Shikamaru wanted this as much as he did. It was difficult to make a response. His vocal chords were set on grunts, moans and whinnies. Not words that made sense.

"Shika...I need this. Please." They were tangled together. Fumbling with buttons and ties. Trying desperately to reach hidden, sensitive flesh. When Shikamaru broke through, groping his way, Neji groaned and retaliated by biting down on Shikamarus neck lightly. Kissing and licking it better, only to bite and suck on it again. Shikamaru was panting lightly at the attention and groaned when Neji moved his had to Shikamaru's crotch. By know they both had their shirts unbuttoned and Neji had his fly undone. His underware was bulging through with his erection.

"Kami, you are gorgeous Neji." Shikamaru's eyes sung with lust. With trembling hands, Neji pulled away and pushed his pants down until they fell away to his ankles. His underware followed readily. He reached over and untied Shikamarus fly, pushing them off till they fell away as well.

"This is the point of no return Neji. Once my underware is off I wont be able to back down. It's all or nothing. It's your choice." Neji jerked slightly at the word usage. Shikamaru was still stratagising, even now in his state of arousal. Looking into Shikamaru's eyes, Neji made his choice.


	4. D is for Decoration

Gaara hated them. He hated all of them. With a passion. They were continuosly blinking at him. With-every-word-he-read, they blinked. All the fucking time. What was worse, when they blinked, he blinked. It was like some chemical reaction that happened in his brain, like it wanted to have the lights on permanently so it thought that, if it made his eyes blink through the off bit as well, it would pretty much be the same thing!

"May Kami come down and smite all these infernal lights!" Gaara was looking up to the ceiling, as if waiting for Kami to actually descend from the heavens and smite the blasted annoying things. When nothing happened, he went back to work. For a minute. Until the light tempo changed. Now it was twice as fast. Gaara stood with all the grace and serenity he could muster, which, at the moment, was limited and walked over to lights. He stopped in front of them. He followed the trail of wire until he reached an end. It was the wrong end. A vein started to throb on his forehead. Following the wire again, the otherway this time, he came to the transformer and a black box attached to it. A smirk blossomed on his lips. He picked it up and turned it over. There was a button on the right hand corner of the devise. The smirk formed into a full blown smile. A crazy smile. A crazy, happy, smile filled with murderous intent. He pushed the button. The lights went out.

"I think I'll fill out that peace treaty with Konoha now." Gaara was centimeters from his desk when the lights started blinking as if on a frenzy. He turned around and pulled at his hair. A scream could be heard for miles around the Kazekage building.

Gaara was seated at his desk, filling out the Konoha peace treaty form, when the door to his office burst open. Temari, Kankuro and a dozen or so other shinobi surged into the room.

"What happened? Is everything alright?" Temari power walked up to her brother and grabbed his shoulder, her eyes as big as saucers filled with worry.

"Everything is fine now, you can all go back to your positions." Gaara was smiling at them all as they left, only Kankuro and Temari remained. Temari looked around the room and spotted the area where the light were...or should have been.

"Gaara, what happened to the light decoration?" Temari looked quizzically between her brother and the lights.

"They died." Gaara smirked evily with the knowledge that the lights were now imprizoned in one of his desk draws, never to see the light of day again whilst he held power. Temari and Kankuro looked to eachother.

"Well, I can go down to the store and buy another set. I'll just be a tick." Kankuro was out the door before he saw the vein on Gaara's head start to throb once again.

One week later in Konoha

"Shizune, come and look at this. Is he serious you think?" Shizune walked into the room and took the papers that were held out to her. A frown made its way onto her face.

"I hope not, that much sake...?" Shizune looked over the papers and at her Hokage, She didn't like the look on the Hokage's face. She looked back the papers and reread the conditional clause.

"However, this treaty will only continue if, when such occasions arise, that when the Kazekage meet with the Hokage, or the other way around, blinking lights will be banned from being displayed in any place, public or private, by either party. To make such measures more bearable a 20 bottle case of sake will be gifted each year to the Hokage in compensation."

"I seriously hope the Kazekage is not serious..."


	5. E is for Essay

"Mah! this is hard!" Naruto rocked on his chair trying to come up with a great response to the essay question.

"Living in a technological enviroment predetermines the out-come of a persons personality to differ from a person who grew up with minimal to no technilogy. Do you agree with this statement. Why/why not?" Naruto wasn't the smartest cookie of them all but he knew the ones who were! With a few numbers punched on his phone a ring tone could be heard by his friend several blocks away. It was located in said friends pocket and was ansered with a -

"Hnn Naruto." Sasuke knew the idiot wanted something and as the idiot was his friend... he might just cave and give him what he wanted. Maybe. Possibly. Yeah, he will.

"I neeeeeeeeeed help with my essay! Heeeeeeeeelp!" Sasuke's eyebrows rose to his hair line. No sasuke-teme? Naruto must be in serious trouble! So with that sasuke hung up and set out for Narutos house... Forgetting to tell Naruto he was on his way.

"Meh! He hung up on me! Sasuke-teme!" Naruto punched a few other numbers and another ringtone could be heard a few blocks away by another friend. This phone was situated on the kitchen counter and was buzzing merrily till it was caught and shoved up against said friends ear.

"Naruto." Neji monotoned into the mobile.

"I need help with my essay. Please for the love of Kami help me!" It took Neji a few seconds to he come up with an adequite response.

"No" And he hung up. Neji opened the fridge and stopped, thinking of all the times Naruto helped him. It was five minutes of a self guilt trip later that Neji picked up his phone and texted Naruto that he'd be round in 20. He left his phone on the counter and waltzed out the door, completely ignorant of the buzz his phone made when a text came in to tell him that he didn't have enough credit to send such a message and to go out and get some.

"Wha? Neji's an arse too! Why are all my friends deserting me at a time like this! aha! Shikamaru!" Naruto punched in the relevant number and waited for it to be answered. He was sent to voicebox. Having another light bulb moment, Naruto scrolled down the list of names on his phone and stopped at 'Shikamaru - home phone.' It was ansered by Shikamaru's mother.

"Ne, Mrs Nara is Shikamaru there?" Naruto pouted when he was told Shikamaru was at a friends house.

"Whose gonna help me now...HINATA!" Naruto phoned said friend. Said friend answered with a small hi, blushing like crazy to be called up by her ultimate crush.

"Hinataaaaaaaaa, Help me with my essay!" Naruto smiled. Hinata can never say no to him, she was way too nice. However, it didn't occur to Naruto that just saying her name in that whiny manner, could cause Hinata to faint on the spot. At this time, thats exactly what happened.

"Hinata. Hinata? HINATA! ARE YOU THERE? No? Must have accidentally answered it..." Naruto hung up with a defeated sigh.

"Why cant I get any help. I can't even ask Sakura cos she's away on holiday...Sakura's so pretty" Naruto went off into Lala land, dreaming of a Sakura who wouldn't physically hurt him every day for being a bit of an idiot and would kiss him instead. His dream Sakura magically had sparkles that trailed after her as she danced about. The front bell ringing shocked him out of his, never to be, dream. As Naruto ran to the door he stopped when he heard muffled talking. There were at least three people behind that door. Shrugging, Naruto unlocked the door and swung it open. Sasuke, Neji, Shikamaru and Hinata were all there. They were frowning at one another, with the exception of Hinata, and looked to Naruto.

"Ah, you all came? But none of you said you were coming!"

"What do you mean? Of couse I did!...Didn't I?" Sasuke had a sneaking suspicion he might have, possibly, maybe, probably hung up on Naruto before he said yes. He'd never acknowlege it.

"I texted you! Didn't it come through?" Neji had a sneaking suspicion that he had no credit on his phone, his uncle might have said something about using his phone for a long distance call. Why his uncle didn't use the land line, or his own phone, was beyond him.

"I knew you'd need help with your essay so I thought I'd come over before you called me. I got caught up talking to Temari." Shikamaru had a hickey on his neck. Enough said.

"Um, I, ah, hmmmm, you needed help, but i wasnt feeling well, so i couldn't speak, but i came..." Hinata turned a violent shade of red before passing out. Again. Neji caught her and swung her up into a bridal stance.

"Let us in dobe."

When it came time to turn in his essay Naruto whooped and ran to the front of the class shuffling about in his bag. With all the help he got that night from the three guys, and eventually Hinata, his essay was ace! The shuffling turn into a panic as he could not find said essay. Said essay was lying innocently on the study desk with a post it note on there which read - "Do Not Forget!" Sometimes, if not always, essay's suck.


	6. F is for Foto?

"Naruto...Thats not how you spell photo." Iruka looked across to the boy standing before his desk. At age eight, he was a little behind with his spelling, so Iruka gave the boy extra spelling homework. He was grading the papers now infront of him. The boy was frowning.

"Huh? Why not?" Iruka's eyebrows rose slightly. Usually kids would accept the corrction and move on. As always with Naruto though, he had to have a reason.

"Because, photo is with a 'Ph' not a 'F'." Nodding once, Iruka went back to the homework. His eye twitched when Naruto's voice whined in his ear.

"But, why have a 'ph' when you can have a 'f'! I mean, why?" Pinching the bridge of his nose, Iruka sighed. The 'PH' phrase could be difficult to understand. Most kids didn't care to understand, they just accepted it as fact...

"Because, Naruto, its derived from ancient Greek." English has many words that have origins in Greek. Many other languages too.

"But, I thought we were learning English?" Iruka looked up to Naruto and saw him pouting, hands on hips. If it wasn't for the short hair, clothing choice and prior knowledge that Naruto was a boy, he would have thought he was a girl. He was very feminine. But that had started to disappear with his ageing. Iruka refocussed on Naruto.

"We are." He saw the boy cock his head to the side. He was thinking things through.

"Then why are we learning ancient Greek?" Iruka blinked a few times. An image popped into his head of a middle aged Naruto standing infront of an old looking Iruka's desk, asking why things were the way they were... Iruka shuddered.

"Where not! English adapts other languages - like ancient greek, into it's own. Understand?" Naruto nodded. But he looked like he was developing another question in his head. Iruka waited it out.

"Why?" Iruka smiled kindly at the boy. It was nice to see someone with a thirst for knowledge that wanted answers, not just to know... Even if it was slightly excasterbating.

"Because the Greeks came up with the word first..." Naruto's eyes widened and his mouth formed the shape of an o. It looked like the boy finally understood.

"Oh." With that Iruka went back to grading the homework. A smile playing at his lips. It was a great feeling to be able to teach a child something, and have them actually learn.


End file.
